15 funny (& unusual!) alternatives for saying "I've got my period!"

Caroline Laffer | 28 September, 2021

knicked period euphamisms slang words for period

You might be wondering, what do "code red", "shark week" and "Aunt Flo" have in common? They're all funny alternatives for saying "I've got my period!" 

Period slangs have been around for decades, often removing the awkwardness some feel around the topic, but also giving us a chance to connect with a little fun and some secret code words when it's that time of the month.

They're widely used by teens and tweens because it can alleviate embarrassment with classmates and BOYS, but they're often used by adults as well ... luckily periods are becoming a far more comfortable subject for kids than they've ever been, which is why as parents and carers, it's so important that we share with  our daughters that we're ok to talk about something that's a natural bodily function, and we're all going to spend nearly ten years of our lives on our periods ... yep. Long time! 

So, having a giggle together over period euphemisms can help them communicate more comfortably when Aunt Flo has come to stay again!

According to an international survey conducted by a health app called Clue, there are over 5,000 slangs or euphemistic expressions and phrases for periods. That means you can play around these words and even use one period slang each month - or make up your own! Join the discussion over on our socials - you'll be amazed what people have come up with 😂

In addition to the study, Chinese and French cultures were the two most common nationalities to use period euphemisms ... which gave me a giggle, because let's face it, whatever's said with a natural French accent usually sounds sexy, right?! (Or is  that just me?! 😂). Imagine hearing a French woman say, "J'ai mes règles," ... translated to English "I've got my period". Different ring to it, would you agree?!!!

So we've compiled a few funny alternatives to "I have my period" without actually saying the word 'period'.

    1. Aunt Flo is visiting
    2. I'm on the rag
    3. It's my lady business
    4. That time of the month/TOM
    5. I'm wearing the red badge of courage
    6. It's my moon time
    7. My red wedding
    8. Mother Nature's gift
    9. Shark week
      ... and these ones definitely more suited to the grown ups;
    10. Bloody Mary
    11. There'll be no circus tonight. The monkey has a nose bleed.
    12. I'm making wine and there will be no stomping of the grapes at this point.
    13. The b*tch is back
    14. My uterus is trying to kill me
    15. My "Bloody Buddy" is here

Which of these period or menstruation slangs have you used or heard? What's the strangest one you've ever heard? Join the discussion on our Facebook page! 👇👇👇